Our journey to owning the land of our dreams took over a year and 5 long months of the mortgage process. I’ve refrained from writing about it until now. Here is our journey.

We closed on Thursday, February 6th. I thought I would be elated but I’m really just teary-eyed. I’m sad that I couldn’t make this a reality before my mother passed. Sad because I was going to invite my best friend and brother a place here also. They are gone now. If it wasn’t for my grandchildren and my two boys, I don’t think I would have bothered with the task of owning land or a house again.

There is still cleaning, organizing, and fixing a few things before we move in. In the meantime, I’m getting the offerings ready for the house spirits and another offering for the land. I already gave the land an offering but it just didn’t seem right until it was officially ours.

I’m glad that I will be there for the Spring and watch things grow and transform. I’m looking forward to getting to know the land, nature spirits, and seeing the grandkids run, laugh, and play.

Journey in Attitude & Thinking

It has been a very rough journey through the years which has taken a toll on us as a family. Our plans and goals kept changing and we’ve wanted to give up plenty of times.  One thing that was constant; we have always had the dream of owning land – our own space in the country to raise animals, enjoy ourselves, and keep to ourselves with nobody knowing our business.

Well, let me correct that. My husband’s dream all along was owning land and a lot of it. I could have done without animals, a farm, and owning a lot of land – then anyway. There are a number of years between my husband and me and our goals have not always aligned at the same time. I have always wanted to do things the sensible, practical, and safe way. Safe, as in fiscally sound and a farm that loses money was not safe to me.

So, my goals were to improve myself and work my way up the latter of success working for someone else. Along the way, I became so disconnected from myself that I developed anxiety, depression, and a fear of everything.

We have done many things to improve our situation, including moving to different states. Things were just as difficult and the same problems followed us. Only, we were alone with no family or friends that we would normally have for emotional support. We’ve always ended up back here to where we started. At first, I was very negative about this but now I know that this is where I belong.

Thing Began to Change

The first I became aware of this was when coming back from road trips and upon entering New York state, I would be struck with an awesome feeling of rightness and belonging to the natural raw beauty of our state. Something deep in me leaped for joy and even then I had a sense of something ancient awaken in me. I didn’t have the concept of our ancestors and spirits back then but something was calling me.

I am slow to learn and understand what is going on around me, so it has taken a number of years to get where I am now. A number of years trying with all my might to align myself with God and the religion I was convinced was the only right one. That began to waver by reading the old testament in the bible. But still, old beliefs are hard to break.

My heart finally opened up and I started learning an amazing technique. Energy healing. Wow! What a game-changer. I learned about energy and our earth and ourselves. How we can work with it and get relief. Still, I had conflicting views and questions that were not answered. That is were “Abraham” comes in – a channeled spirit who comes through Esther Hicks. His answers really calmed me down and let me know that all was well, it really was. This expanding led to other things including Wicca, Shamanism, and finally, here I am, hearing the call of the ancestors of place and my own ancestors, and hearing momma earth who let me in on a few insights. This led me to Druidism and the Proto-Indo Europeans. It all made sense now and I am now grounded and in alignment.

Painful Journey

Through the years we have rented and never thought we would own a house let alone land. We have found ourselves homeless once. Eventually, we had an opportunity to own land by entering into a land contract and own a house in town. We had 1 acre of land and we lived there for 13 years trying to make our dream work. It didn’t. The location sucked. The house sucked. No amount of gratitude helped. It never felt right. The electricity was sometimes over $400 in the winter and I was freezing every year.

After many years later and learning how to manifest using the energy and natural cycles of the moon, I began to get serious in the realization of my dreams which for once was finally in alignment with my husband.

Manifesting Owning Land of Our Dreams

This manifestation of owning a house with property took a long time. We put a for sale sign in our yard the summer of 2017 and a few people stopped to ask about it and one realtor contacted us to help us. But, I knew going that route was going to cost us serious money and the house and location was not going to get us any return in our money.

This was because our house was self-built 50 years ago and falling down. One one side of us we had the village/town filtration plant and on the other side the village park. Every single day from Spring to Fall there were people and cars everywhere. Therefore, there was no privacy ever, not even in our back yard.

I always thought that if we weren’t there, the village/town would have this space and could have more parking or whatever. I thought it should be theirs and I knew the village/town would never be able to afford the place if we poured more money into fixing it up. Our neighbor across the street helped us get the word out to the village/town but nothing happened that first year.

Urgency of Owning Land

By the Fall, I was desperate to find a place because my mother needed to move in with me and I needed more room for her. Nothing worked out then and in the early Spring, time ran out for my mother. In the Summer of 2018 things began to get a little more serious. The village/town was definitely interested. But still, things happened ever so slow.

In August of 2018, our electricity was shut off. There was no getting it back on. It was just too much money and I would still have a problem keeping up with the bill. We decided to live off-grid. Yeah, that was freaking hard.

By the Spring of 2019 final plans to sell were in place and we had till August to pack up and leave. Finally, the dream of owning land and a little farm was taking hold. In the meantime, I received an amazing opportunity to have a life coach to keep me be accountable to myself and help me through my negativity and the manifesting process.

At the end of July, we were packing and I was getting ready for work in the morning and I got a phone call that shook my world….again. My best friend of 45 years had passed away.  I went to Illinois for him, his family, and my other best friend of many years. We all hung out together when we were kids. So, I was packing, about to be homeless, and dealing with that.

So, when I came back we had to get the heck out of the house fast.

Where were we going to? I had no idea because we needed money to move somewhere. We decided to go to a campground and at the last minute, a family member offered us his half remodeled garage to stay in until we found something.

Almost Homeless Again

Our nephew kept talking about his neighbor who had passed away and he knew the family and that they were going to sell. We looked at this place a couple of times and I was not impressed by the house in the least bit. But the more I went over the more interested I got. So by September, we had two places that would be a good fit.

Once again things dragged on. Which place would we get? Our stomachs were in knots and we were at each other’s throats.

Then October came and I got another shocking phone call. This time I was at work. My brother had passed away. I was in shock and sick to my stomach and left work shaking and trying to get ahold of family.

We stayed in the garage and I worked through it all from August to February. Things were dark and I had to work through some of my shit.

By January 2020, the mortgage on the house looked like it was definitely going through and by February it was ours. We finally owned land and more than one acre or even 10 acres. We were landed again, and it felt good and bittersweet at the same time.

Conclusion of Our Journey to Owning Land

Whew!! What a very long painful journey to owning the land of our dreams that was. It is one that I never want to relive. I’m not going anywhere until I die.

So yeah, I’m looking forward to life slowing down and getting cheaper in the money department. I’m looking forward to spring, renewal, making dreams a reality, learning, and enjoying life, and I am truly grateful to own land again.